|About the Book|
This story is part of the Zodiac Schmodiac story cycle, a group of short stories based on the Chinese Zodiac. Remember the paper placemats with zodiac animals from your favorite Chinese buffet? The things it tells you are wildly inaccurate andMoreThis story is part of the Zodiac Schmodiac story cycle, a group of short stories based on the Chinese Zodiac. Remember the paper placemats with zodiac animals from your favorite Chinese buffet? The things it tells you are wildly inaccurate and probably have no resemblance whatsoever to your life or situation, but reading them is fun and writing these stories was too.After I finished writing Adventures in the Land of Singing Garbage Trucks my wife and I sat down to brainstorm what kind of book I should start working on next.‘I think I should write something serious,’ I said.‘You are incapable of being serious,’ my wife said. Unfortunately she is right. I have a hard time doing serious. ‘You should retell some old Chinese stories.’This sounded like a good plan, something that would be fun to write without having to exert too much brain power. After all, the stories were already written, how hard could it be to just change them up a bit? I then sat in front of a blank screen for hours and wrote exactly nothing.‘What’s wrong?’ my wife asked.‘I just can’t seem to get started, I don’t know what to say.’‘Tell the zodiac story. But tell it in that strange over-exaggerated way you use when telling friends about stuff.’ Alas, this is also true, I have a hard time sticking to the facts when it comes to telling stories. Then the lightning bolt hit! I don’t have to tell the truth, or tell the story the right way! The words flew off the page after that.So, if you are hoping to learn the story of the Chinese Zodiac through a traditional retelling, you’ll probably be very disappointed. If you are looking for an accurate translation of an original Chinese text, you’re SOL as well. But if you’d like to read a big fat lie, then this is the story for you. And you’ll still learn about the story as well, just with a bit of Laoshu attitude. This is the way the story would have been if the ancient Chinese storytellers had a bit of an attitude. I hope you enjoy it.